When the Inner Child Bubbles

Even if you don’t believe there’s an inner…I ask you to read this.

Iced Tea with Lemon's Blog

“After a while the middle-aged person who lives in her head
begins to talk to her soul, the kid.”
–Anne Lamott, from the novel Joe Jones

Yesterday morning I awoke to perfection. My eyes fluttered lazily in the pre-dawn moments as a lilac-scented breeze shivered through the curtains and the wind chimes tinkled while a growing chorus of bluebirds and warblers, robins and wrens greeted the rising sun. I lay silently for a few, precious minutes, basking in the peaceful glory–but then my traitorous mind remembered the long list of chores awaiting my attack, and I stumbled grudgingly from my haven.

When I retired almost two years ago, I mistakenly thought all my days would be my own, to do with as I pleased. And while I do spend a disproportionate amount of time in my pajamas (which can be verified by the Fed Ex delivery man, the UPS man, the mail lady and the…

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What a Year 2011 has been…

Jan: Lost in the world of emotional attachment; loving all the weight I had lost at this point from the surgery.

Feb: Started a tug-a-war work with God, but of course He won. Joined a bible study by John Ortberg. Took Koda to see Dr. Gutmann for the first time in St. Louis @ NF Clinic. Hubby gettin better with age 🙂 Missing my mom; it was 6 years since a car wreck tragically took her life. 😦

March: Wow, made some complete decisions to Quit living the lie & searched the Truth: joined a group.     Transitioned Koda from home school to John Fiske Elementary. Time to focus on me a bit. Walking!!!

April: Learned what a boundary was & then started placing them on purpose 🙂 Healthy relationships grew! Joined a new church that feeds my soul.

May: My oldest daughter graduated, making me feel pretty dang old; and my baby boy turned 6.

June: Well I hated coming into my thirties; but now I’m starting on that journey out as I turned 38. White hairs! Do a Beth Moore Bible Study w/ CCC. Celebrated 8 years of marriage.

July: Summer is here, my youngest daughter finally gets a car; no longer taxi 😀 I start getting lazy. Became a Thirty-One Consultant…gotta love bags! Happy 82nd birthday to Grandma Lola & 60th to Uncle Basil.

August: School starts; routines begin; homework, IEP’s and a chaotic mess when it comes to meds; Focus on Koda full force now. Holly is a Senior!! Another graduation coming up. Happy 19th birthday to Halie.

September: Struggled with meds, Forget about self trying to figure out how to best help Koda. Ricky & I join a marriage group; Yay…love our group!! Happy 18th birthday to Holly.

October: Koda fails hearing/vision test at school, Koda gets glasses for astigmatism, abnormal optics send us back for MRI.

November: Koda’s plexiform neurofibroma has grown, Koda has a new brain tumor. Devastated for a moment! I have all the kids for Thanksgiving. Watch plaza lighting with kids. Missing my mother-in-law; it has been one year since she decided she wanted to go home.

December: Holly ACT scores 27 :D, ADHD meds finally get settled, 3 denials for chemo coverage; then approved on Christmas Eve. Koda starts chemo (Gleevac). Holly goes to visit her dad & family. We spent Christmas with Mrs. Hottie Patoddie (Aunt Marilyn) & Family. Halie brings Holly home & we celebrate Christmas again on New Years Eve :D.

 

A special thank you to all of you that have been personally involved in our life this year. Thank you for caring enough to step out of your own lives unselfishly to bless ours. Your outpouring of time, talent, finances, and hearts have forever impacted ours. We love you!! Because of you…

I’m simply Lola; Living Out Loud Authentically by Leaning On Lord Almighty.

The healing has begun…

Blessings & Happy New Year,

Lola Yvonne

A new tumor…

a brain glioma and the growth of a plexiform neurofibroma causes us to have a new journey through chemo. Koda’s status; sign his guestbook.

Can it get any worse for me…

is what I use to say as I have looked homelessness in the face, I have been in a place of my life when I didn’t have a bed, I have known a lot of people and never had a “friend”, I have been in the pits of darkness, loss, and despair. I have been by the bedside of my loved ones whom took their last breath, I have been forced to do things I would have never chose on my own, I had to grow up fatherless, I have children with medical/health/development/behavioral issues, I have lost my mother at a young age, I have been through a divorce, I have done and seen way more than I would ever ask anyone to even image. But because of these things; I can say “I understand” when there is another one in that place, I can comfort with words of experience, I can encourage when there is no hope, I can just listen when they need to tell someone, I can embrace when they need to cry. There’s healing in relationships of being known. I’ve healed because God has so gracely placed such people in my life. For this I am so eternally grateful.

…for the little things, but some of the most important things; a roof, a bed, blankets, and the things money can’t buy; like true friendship when you need a bed…they bring you one. I’ve got to experience that a lot lately. More than I want really but am so thankful. Through people being the hands and feet of Jesus I have a desire to know Him better. It’s because of Him that we have anything good. I have gifted, energetic, creative, and amazing children, I have a simple home with all the love in the world, I have Jesus in my heart, and I have a husband who loves me, provides to the uttermost, and just plain likes me. I have a Heavenly Father, I’m no longer in a pit of despair, I have a mother awaiting me in Heaven, I chose to do things now that make a difference in the world, I see things in a different view, I walk hand to heart with people into the unimaginable, I help deliver backpacks of food for children in need, I have a lot of friends, I can sit and be quiet when I really want to shout, I can help comfort the dying to a place they really want to go, I see the light daily, and I’m thankful that He has made it so clear through the windows of our eyes if we’ll just open them and take off the glasses of lies. We are without excuse the Bible tells us…

“For since the creation of the world God’s invisible qualities—his eternal power and divine nature—have been clearly seen, being understood from what has been made, so that men are without excuse.”
Romans 1:19-21

Thankful…for my vision, health, limbs, ability to move, speak, hear, and most of all live in the freedom to express my love for Jesus; and all He has done for me! Are you thankful?

Discounts vs The Original Price

Discounts vs The Original Price.

Discounts vs The Original Price

Shopping! Love going shopping, and if I can hit the clearance rack walking out with 80% off…well then I have accomplished much. How much did they have to mark it up though to get that 80% off to look like a great deal? When you get home with your new item; later to find it ripped or damaged in some way? Do you peel all the discount stickers back to find the original price? I know I do; I want to know how much of a discount I really got.

Unfortunately we all have been dealt some circumstances throughout life that put a discount sticker on us. I have to say mine started a long time ago, and every time that I got “abandoned, abused, judged, walked on, left lonely, torn, hurt” it put another discount on myself. I went searching for affirmations in the wrong places, with the wrong people, and with the wrong mindset on how to feel worth something.

I’m not worth anything at this point, well that’s what I use to say. The stickers piled up, 5% off, 10% off, 20, 25, 40, 50, 70, 80… on and on. I can now say priceless, there is no value on the human spirit but PRICELESS!

I have found the original price again, and I am worth it…you are worth it. When is the last time you went to the doctor, bought yourself some much-needed underwear, got a professional haircut/color, bought yourself a dress/suit, applied for a job that you are worth, paid for a counselor (yes, that is part of well-being); no some of these things are nice wants and some are needs. How much have you neglected your needs because you thought you had been discounted to worthless? Some of you would work overtime, borrow, beg to find the money to pay for a child/friend/family members need and even wants, but what about you?

You are fearfully and wonderfully made, and He desires to be with you. You bring joy to Him without giving anything in return except for a little faith that all things are possible thru Him. Do you know Him, no I don’t mean have you seen someone try to pretend to be something, or go to a service that talks about him, or even remembering the childhood stories from Sunday School class…no sometimes often way too often that is additional judgement, rules, and regulations of an angry disappointed man way off in the distance waiting to slam you down for all you have done. No, I’m talking about the greatest intimacy giver there is, one that loves to wrap you in His arms of peace. You can really talk to Him on a very personal level, and even get mad at Him; it’s ok, He can handle it. He just wants to be with you…are you seeking someone to be with that makes you feel like a Queen/King; that enjoys just being with you. It’s real, and He already paid the Original Price for you! You don’t have to be worthless, discounted, thrown away, salvage, trash, wondering who you are; you are everything.

You were made on purpose with a purpose!

Ask Him, I dare you! May you find your worth today, and most of all your best friend to whom can confirm the lies that you have listened to all this time are really lies. If any of these words struck something in your spirit, look up the word in the Bible. God just may talk to you right now.

Transitions can take a toll…

on a family. It seems we’re becoming the professionals of transition though. I used to say people with this much change must be asking or in need of drama. LOL! Drama, there’s none of it going on here…well, until you think about all of it at once then the anxiety attack comes. I swear I’ve never even had an anxiety attack or know what one feels like. Maybe my life has always been one so I don’t know the difference. Ohhh wait, I think it might be peri-menopause…oh no, it’s not that; too young!! ;D

Can I just say that I’m going crazy, but at the same time have a peace that I can’t understand; yep that’s the signs of INSANITY!! Confused! Ok so, within one week we have (remembering we only have one vehicle for 4 of us needing to be places) a change of work hours for the hubby, the boy is transitioning into public school two hours daily, the teenager still needs to go to work, clubs, volunteer, and then have surgery on the 9th, and finds out she’s got other medical issues that needs attention along with me.

Well me, that’s one place we won’t go because remember I’m confused and have no idea whether I’m having hot flashes or just ticked off; I’m at peace or in denial, I’m coming or going. Life is good, but transitions can take you to a side of life that challenges the mind, body, and spirit. I am alive! Pinching, to double check. Yep, it hurts!!

The biggest transition is myself really trying to get transformed to whom I was designed to be. I have been told for a long time that “hurt people always hurt people”. We all have been hurt by someone or some event in our lives and it does seem that we end up hurting the ones we love the most when we are hurting. I’ve done a lot of reading lately, and who we “are” really determines how we act “show ourselves to be” towards others.

I’m transitioning into becoming on purpose a person that no longer hurts people just because I am hurt, but to be there & do for despite the hurt. To hurt along with, beside, hold, and love the people that have hurt me, to be a friend, ear, shoulder, a place of trust when there seems like there is no one or nothing else to turn to. Transitioning me helps transition healing to others one person at a time. During this transition of myself, I am whom I am and who I was made to be but I have to tap into what that looks like and feels like, then act on it. I have to say that can make one tired…ohh but I have a remedy for that; this stuff (not telling right now) is fabulous. I can’t even take a nap because it won’t let me. 🙂

So with the transitions that I can just jot down they include: raised by grandparents and a gay parent, a father that disowned me, being sexually abused, giving birth to 3 children of which 1 is medically complex, 2 marriages, emotional abuse, verbal abuse, and physical abuse, mood swings of the normal woman, different jobs (searching for where I’m suppose to be), renting to owning back to renting our homes, health issues of my own, enabling/enabler, going back to school, independent /co-dependency, death of loved ones with each pregnancy, watching dementia shadow the person who knew it all…..the list goes on and on like anyone else’s life. It’s no different, I’m no different, transitions happen and they continue to happen…it can take a toll only if you let it. I choose to make it abundant, vibrant, joyful, and share it so I don’t have to keep it. Transitions are steps in life to make us stronger, wiser, and most of all to give us the experience to be the good Samaritan.

Embracing, Educating, Energizing, and Enthusiastically Encouraging for all to be alive and actively involved in others! Bring on transition…excited to see what’s next ;oP

No weapon formed against me shall prosper: Isaiah 54:17.

Crohn’s Disease Is Associated with Restless Legs Syndrome

Researchers investigating a link between restless legs syndrome (RLS) and Crohn’s disease (CD) uncovered results that demonstrate RLS occurs frequently in people with CD and appears to be a possible extraintestinal manifestation of CD. This research appeared in the February 2010 issue of Inflammatory Bowel Disease.

CD is an ongoing disorder that causes inflammation of the digestive tract, also referred to as the gastrointestinal (GI) tract. CD can affect any area of the GI tract, from the mouth to the anus, but it most commonly affects the lower part of the small intestine, called the ileum.

CD has a variety of possible extraintestinal manifestations: arthritis, skin problems, kidney stones, gallstones, and liver diseases. This study is the first to show central nervous system (CNS) manifestations of CD.

RLS is a condition in which a person experiences extreme leg discomfort while sitting or lying down. RLS may be primary or secondary to a number of disorders. Secondary RLS occurs in a variety of patient populations, including pregnant women and people with end-stage renal disease, iron-deficiency anemia, rheumatoid arthritis, diabetes, Parkinson’s disease, or fibromyalgia.

Because both CD and RLS are associated with iron deficiency, GI tract inflammation, and bacterial overgrowth, researchers designed the study to investigate the potential link between these two disorders.

“Overall, RLS was found to be a common comorbid condition in patients with CD,” stated Leonard B. Weinstock, M.D., Department of Internal Medicine, Washington University School of Medicine, St. Louis, MO, and colleagues. “The incidence of RLS in patients with CD reported in this study was greater than the incidence of many of the known extraintestinal manifestations of CD.”

A total of 272 patients with CD participated in the study, and researchers found a 43 percent incidence rate and 30 percent prevalence rate of RLS in patients with CD, compared with a 9 percent prevalence rate in the control group. RLS symptoms occurred during or after the onset of CD symptoms in the majority of patients, suggesting a link between CD and RLS.

Systemic disease symptoms of CD include malnutrition and anemia. Iron deficiency is the main cause of anemia in CD as a consequence of dietary restrictions, malabsorption, and intestinal bleeding. People at risk for iron deficiency are also at risk for RLS. The study showed that current systemic iron deficiency was not associated with RLS in patients with CD, but significantly more patients with CD and RLS reported a history of iron deficiency than those without RLS symptoms.

Previous studies have demonstrated an association of small intestinal bacterial overgrowth with CD in the ileum. The results of this study suggest ileum involvement in patients with CD may be a risk factor for RLS. The researchers hypothesized that inflammation attributable to other systemic and GI-related disorders, such as CD, results in an iron deficiency in the CNS, causing RLS.

Researchers hope the association of RLS with CD may lead to an understanding of fatigue and sleep disturbances associated with CD. Further studies are warranted to evaluate the potential impact that RLS has on the quality of life in patients with CD using the international RLS rating scale.

The National Digestive Diseases Information Clearinghouse, an information dissemination service of the National Institute of Diabetes and Digestive and Kidney Diseases, has fact sheets and easy-to-read booklets about digestive disorders, including CD. For more information and to obtain copies, visit www.digestive.niddk.nih.gov.

The Haunting of the Demonic Stove

Ok, I know that my cooking is pretty good; no one gains the weight that I have without such cooking. I am not much of a “microwave”  or “out of the box” cooker. I love actual ingredients that I have to mix to make a meal. I take pride in my cooking as well. As I was cooking my famous cheesy chicken enchiladas last night, a strange crackling sound overwhelmed the air in the house. I happened to be in the living room at the time, walked back in toward the kitchen of where the actual sound was coming from; then it started popping…what is going on??

As I step into the kitchen, the digital lights of the clock on my stove was blinking radically fast, then it was gone like it had lost all power. I definitely have a short somewhere and didn’t think anymore about it; I can do without the timer. WRONG, it wasn’t done and I call it the haunting of the demonic stove now because as soon as I tried to walk away again……..CRACKLING, POPPING, almost voices coming from this appliance made me stare at it thinking I might just want to unplug the thing before we actually have a fire.

HA, then next…what happened next made me laugh so hard; I turned away once more then POP, SNAP, Electrically haunting noises started to increase in volume…I looked back at the stove and the pic attached spoke to me. I have a demonic stove and it’s number is 6:66, and since there is no actual time as that I think I might just have to put this thing out for the trashman.

I don’t want to put it out too early because then the recyclers, the faithful people that come every day to see if someone has put something out that they can make a dime on might get it. Now that would be horrible of me to share such a demon with them because they just might not get top dollar for it. The stove just might take them in and decided they are dinner. So with much prayer, I have taken a liken to this stove. It has served me well, and I will work it to it’s death.

Now some would say, now Yvonne you really should put that thing out for the trash; but who would put the proof of a haunted demonic stove out. I need proof besides this pic, so everyone is invited to come over for dinner. Please RSVP so I know how many I should prepare for. This would have been perfect for a Halloween event…maybe it’ll stay around long enough for such this year.

Neurofibromatosis; Our New information

http://www.caringbridge.org/visit/koda/journal

Thank you for reading our journey w/ Koda and his NF diagnosis.